Dear Listener,

I'm sorry to say that the audiobook you arc holding in your hands is extremely unpleasant. It tells an unhappy tale about three very unlucky children. Even though they are charming and clever, the Baudelaire siblings lead lives filled with misery and woe. From the very beginning of this Program when the children are at the beach and receive terrible news, continuing on to the entire story, disaster lurks at their heels. One might say they are magnets for misfortune. In this short audiobook alone, the three youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing, a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, and cold porridge for breakfast. It is my sad duty to tell these unpleasant tales, but there is nothing stopping you from turning off this audio and listening to something happy, if you prefer that sort of thing.

With all due respect,

Lemony Snicket